Nonsensical ramble - please ignore me.........

[suanz]

Ever had an incident where you know the style of a particular fanfic author is not your cup of tea, yet you still go ahead and read another of the author's story out of curiosity???

Well - it happened to me. I cannot say that the author is bad - in fact the author is really good, I think(??). It's just kinda dark & depressing.

I simply cannot comprehend why the fuck I torment myself cos the last time I read this author's fic, I was fucking disturbed.

Anyway, despite that, I did not stop midway cos I had to know the ending right. No point being disturbed and not reading the entire story, right?? Afterall, I'm already affected/upset/whatever.

As expected, I was once again disturbed by the story. I tell myself - It's just a story. Snap out of it!!!! But it creeps into my mind now & then.

I really need to get a life. Sigh.........

Comments

[pixie-blade.livejournal.com]

Now you've peaked my interest in the writer who could do that to you. But yeah, I've totally done that, esp (and I don't want to say bad) but really poor spellers with massive grammar issues. Or writers who don't seem to try and connect with the characters at all and just have them do whatever they feel like without regard to the characters personality and not call it an AU. I know we've all done it at least once, and yes, I've been pointed out myself, but there's a difference in not caring and not knowing. You know?

Sorry, I think I ran away with your soap box... *slinks away to some deep dark corner*

[suanz.livejournal.com]

This author tends to write about the characters' dark side, which if I think about it, may possibly exist but I refuse to believe that they would give into that dark side and do whatever they did in the story.

I'm such an idealist, aren't I? Ha Ha Ha

I'd wish I can step out and give myself a kick in the arse.

(Nice icon. Tiotally suitable for this post. LOL)

[pixie-blade.livejournal.com]

I must say, a dark aspect every now and again is kinda refreshing, in a creepy, fatalistic sort of way, but I don't think I could only write it.

[kirathaune.livejournal.com]

I've had that happen a couple of times - I really enjoyed their writing style, but the direction the fic took would bother me for DAYS.

And like you said, you have to finish it - not knowing is even worse!

[7veilsphaedra.livejournal.com]

I have to prepare myself emotionally to read or write dark!fic. Sometimes, I'm not sure why, but it seems that the story wants to be written as darkfic or amoral, and to write it any other way is emotionally dishonest. But I tend to be of the sort where the stories write themselves and I just facilitate the process by transcribing them. If they aren't coming through, it's because I'm blocking them—usually ego-stuff. But I always try to warn my readers. When you started reading the story, were you adequately forewarned?

[suanz.livejournal.com]

It had the usual warnings yes. I actually dun need to read the warnings cos I know the author by reputation. (I've read one of the author's fic before and scanned thru some to know the style.)

I guess curiosity got the better of me, and I succumbed.

This rant is more to kick myself in the arse for my idiocy. =^_^=

[suanz.livejournal.com]

I love darkfics / sickfics - most of the time. It's just that this particular author's style is a bit too much for me so I tend to avoid it. Go figure.

My bad, really. I guess boredom got the better of me. :(

[rroselavy.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure why, but it seems that the story wants to be written as darkfic or amoral, and to write it any other way is emotionally dishonest.

That happens to me, too. Stories tend to take a life of their own. As a rule, I'm not a huge fan of dark!fic, though, and recently I read something dark posted without warnings which mildly upset me, though not enough to wank over it. That said, there are some authors I read despite the dark cast to their work because they are just that good.

[keire-ke.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean. :) There are a couple authors who I know are magnificent, but I have trouble with reading the fics because they are just too angsty.

[suanz.livejournal.com]

That said, there are some authors I read despite the dark cast to their work because they are just that good.


I am a fan of darkfics. I love the emotions a good darkfic can evoke from the reader.

Having said that, I knew what to expect from the author. I knew I would not like it yet I went ahead with it. WTF??? Hence I'm sometimes amazed by myself......... LOL

I just have this need to clarify again to everybody - the issue here is me. Not the author at all. I do think it is a powerful & thought provoking piece - it's just my own opinion/issues. Sighs......

[suanz.livejournal.com]

However I do love the emotions a good darkfic can evoke from the reader.

Geez... on top of being a sucker for self-torture aka idiot, I'm a contradiction. LOL

[rroselavy.livejournal.com]

Do you think it's because you hope it will be different each time?

You know I'm dying to know what story it was

[suanz.livejournal.com]

Uhm.. I don't think so cos this fic was not a recent one.

Would it be ok for me to reveal the fic here? I wouldn't want to offend anyone especially the author. Can I email you instead?

[rroselavy.livejournal.com]

You can PM me?

[suanz.livejournal.com]

Done. :)

[7veilsphaedra.livejournal.com]

No, dark!fic is one of those things that takes its psychic toll.

The only similar experience I can think of is listening to really raunchy pop or rock music, or melancholy romantic era classical music, but even then, that has a light at the end of it. I used to listen to Rachmaninoff's piano concertos when I wanted to think up grandiose epics. The songs were full of goofy dastardly betrayals, eponymous Rachmaninoffismheroism, and more weird WTF moments than Total Eclipse of the Heart. So there was a ripe hour or two spent in my head, and afterwards, I blew my nose, washed my face and got back to scrubbing out the fridge, or toilet, or interviewing the Mayor. All the emo purged.

Darkfic can be unrelenting. The shock stays with you.

[suanz.livejournal.com]

Darkfic can be unrelenting. The shock stays with you.

Wow!! You nailed it! Thanks for putting it in words for me. I could not have said it better.